on being a boy mom //

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Ya know, if you would’ve told me I would have kids, I probably would have laughed in your face. And if you told me I would have a boy, I would laugh hysterically. And then tell you there’s no way in hell I was having a boy.

When we found out we were expecting a ‘surprise,’ on the day Pfizer announced a birth control pill recall I was overly confident that we would be having a girl.

Chad is the oldest of four. He’s also the only boy out of 4 kids. I have one sibling — a sister. And I have eight female cousins. It took ages to finally have a male cousin. I’ve only ever babysat little baby girls. So I was “destined” to have a girl. Right??

I was set on it, actually. Convinced we were having a girl. When anyone asked that age old “what do you think you’re having?” I always answered with “I can just feel that it’s a girl.”

Wrong. Oh so wrong.

That sonogram appointment rocked my world. I was in shock, at first. And shock led to denial. And then a teeny bit of sadness about not having a girl to dress up. And then finally to acceptance.

It wasn’t until Ari was born that I finally accepted our fate of having a boy. But it took months after that to truly realize what that meant.

To be honest, those first few months I feel like it wouldn’t have mattered, boy or girl. That baby was colicky! But when he started to become more human (aka – when he started to sleep at night and stay awake during the day), his gender started to play a role.

He started to pull at my face and eyes and mouth; he started to kick and scream and laugh like a boy; and eventually he started to do other boy things.

Even though I have never had a girl baby, I can tell you that this boy baby of mine, try as I might to have a personality-neutral baby, is A THOUSAND PERCENT boy — through and through!

He’s a climber. He’s a prankster. He’s an adorable little piece of work.

But he’s also a mama’s boy. He loves to snuggle. He knows how to high-five. He gives me open-mouthed kisses. And he gets really excited when Sid The Science Kid comes on in the mornings.

I can’t imagine my life any other way.

I can’t imagine having had a baby girl.

Because I believe whole heartedly that I was meant to be a boy mom.

So much so that I’ve verbally announced that I wish for our second (and last) child to be a boy. — which obviously means I’ll be having a girl, right? Ha!

I know one day, my future second child will laugh in the face of this blog post; and one day I may regret having written it; but in this moment, in this time, I completely embrace being a boy mom.

I look forward to everything the future holds for me as a boy mom. He already has me wrapped around his little finger.