mental health

31 Day Self Care Challenge

April 23, 2021 by Rachel 7 Comments

The past year has done a number on all of us. I know find myself riding a roller coaster. Some weeks I feel like I have it all under control; other weeks I am struggling in every way possible. Each day of this 31 Day Self Care Challenge I’ll give you a simple actionable task that you can do. Whether it’s starting your morning off on the right foot, or sneaking in a workout for the day, after 31 days you’ll be amazed at the difference in your mood.

Self Care Week ONE

Day 1

Wake up 30 minutes early and sit in silence or with your favorite podcast.

Day 2

Make a list of at least 5 things you’re grateful for.

Day 3

Do a brain dump on a pad of paper, a notepad in your phone, or even in a Google doc.

Day 4

Make your favorite recipe (or your favorite meal from a takeout restaurant!).

Day 5

Rewatch your favorite movie.

Day 6

Spend 15 minutes organizing any space in your home (I recommend going through the junk drawer!).

Day 7

Aim to drink at least 64 ounces of water today.

Self Care Week 2

Day 8

Unplug from social media for one full day.

Day 9

Learn a new skill.

Day 10

Create a vision board.

Day 11

Go through old photos.

Day 12

Pick up that book you’ve been meaning to read and get started.

Day 13

Try your hand at a new recipe.

Day 14

Write down a list of personal long-term goals.

Self Care WEEk 3

Day 15

Catch up with a friend or family member by phone.

Day 16

Learn a new skill.

Day 17

Bake your favorite dessert.

Day 18

Take a long, relaxing bath with a bath bomb.

Day 19

Move your body with a NEW workout!

Day 20

Binge watch your favorite (or new) TV show.

Self Care Week 4

Day 21

Treat yourself to ice cream.

Day 22

Take yourself out on a solo date.

Day 23

Break out the coloring books and take some time relaxing with some crayons (or colored pencils)!

Day 24

Take a nap — you deserve it!

Day 25

Go for a 20-minute walk by yourself today.

Day 26

Write a friend a letter and send it (yes — snail mail!).

Day 27

Dress up and take some selfies (even if you have nowhere to go!).

Day 28

Plan your dream vacation (even if it’s just a dream).

Self Care Final days

Day 29

Plan a night in for yourself.

Day 30

Make a new playlist.

Day 31

Do a digital cleanse by clearing out old files, upload photos to the cloud, and clear out your phone and laptop.

Self-care doesn’t always come easy for busy moms, but this challenge will allow you to find those pockets in your day to sneak in some time for yourself.

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Maternal Mental Health Matters: Quit telling moms they’re overreacting

February 9, 2021 by Rachel 12 Comments

I first became a mom 8 years ago. Before I became a mom, I had the perfect vision of what type of mom I would be. You know, the kind of mom that doesn’t yell, only serves their kids organic foods, and has zero temper. Well we all have plans on the type of parent we are going to be before we have kids. But kids have a way of humbling us. And as a ‘seasoned’ mom of three kids, I have advice for all of the advice-givers: quit telling moms they’re overreacting.

Maternal Mental Health is fragile

Did you know that one in 8 women experience postpartum depression? I did. Because I became one of those statistics. And it hurt me to my core to come to grips with this fact. I knew I was supposed to feel a tremendous amount of joy after the birth of my first child; but, instead, I felt an unimaginable anxiety and disappointment. And, while this might not be the case for every mom, we are doing all moms a disservice by pretending that any one stage in a child’s life is “easy”. Every single stage in a child’s life comes with its own set of difficulties and setbacks.

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But, perhaps, a mom has a very bad infant stage or toddler stage. In those fragile moments, a mother may be at her breaking point. I myself have been there. She may be questioning if she can do this at all. Why perpetuate the myth that others are doing it (or handling it) better than us?

“You’ll miss this someday”

I cannot tell you how many times I was told this. By the grace of God I decided to have a second baby. Our first was so colicky and my postpartum anxiety was out of control; but we still decided on a second baby. My luck? Our second infant was worse than our first. Unbeknownst to us, she had been dealing with chronic UTIs from about 6 weeks to 9 months. She would scream (and, I kid you not) for 22-23 hours a day. That left approximately 1-2 hours of (broken) sleep in a 24-hour period. How does a newborn even survive on that? No idea.

But I will tell you what, I almost did not survive that.

In fact, I can vividly remember three times that I almost self-admitted to the hospital because of psychological issues. And, I don’t take that lightly. I was at least cognitive enough to realize, in that moment, that if I checked myself into the hospital, it would be a disservice to my child physically (she wouldn’t take a bottle).

But the suicidal ideation remained. Even through my existing anxiety and depression medication, motherhood had taken its toll. And I cannot tell you how many times I heard “someday you’ll miss this,” and thought about how I must be a failure — because I could not imagine missing this moment.

Whether its infancy or toddlerhood or adolescence, it’s all difficult

I recently engaged in a Facebook conversation on a mommy page (I know — that in itself is the problem). The original poster had created a poll — which is more difficult? The infant stage or the toddler stage. My initial gut-reaction was to answer the poll. Duh, infancy. And then I pulled back. I read the article in question. And, as I deemed this group an engaging and progressive group of moms, I decided to point out the obvious (to me) — this article is hella problematic.

First, it is entirely dismissive. I realize this was a tounge-and-cheek type of article. But, to quote the author , she slept — “Nevertheless, I felt clear-headed and was able to get good chunks of sleep both at night and during the day.” And a clear head is basically the key to keeping one’s sanity.

But one in 8 women don’t feel that way.

If you tell one of those women struggling to get up and take care of her baby that “she will miss this one day,” it may be the thing that pushes her to a breaking point. Suicide is one of the leading causes of death in new mothers.

And articles such as stated above — as well as the dismissiveness of others — can certainly compound on that feeling of hopelessness.

Please stop telling moms they’re overreacting

Here’s a thought — don’t tell anyone — not moms, not dads, not the lady at the grocery store — that they are overreacting. Let us all recognize that we are living a very narrow margin of the full spectrum of possibilities. If you wouldn’t tell someone with a physical ailment that they are overreacting, don’t say it to someone who is (potentially) suffering from a mental ailment. Period.

My Wish For the New Year

January 4, 2021 by Rachel 7 Comments

Twenty-twenty was anything but awesome for many people. I, myself, didn’t have too terrible of a year. Thankfully, the health of my family remained in tact. And I was able to stay at home and care for my young family. I realize that this is not a position that everyone was in. But I found myself pleasantly surprised by the turn of events that landed me in a new role serving as a public official. That stands as only the beginning of my wish for the New Year.

My wish for my personal life

Twenty-twenty consisted of some major changes in my personal life. I said goodbye to people who had come into my life at various points over the last few years. In many ways, I saw this coming. I knew that 2020 would be a game-changer when it came to politics. I knew that my personal politics, which I stand firmly grounded in, would be pushed up against those with severely differing opinions. And, in many ways, I was prepared for that to happen. But that doesn’t mean it didn’t suck to lose people.

Moving into this new year, I hope that my new and strengthened relationships from 2020 continue to grow. Even if that means I’ve curated a very close group of like-minded friends and acquaintances. I will nurture those relationships and hold them close. It’s the only way to remain close to people throughout a pandemic.

My wish for my career

To my surprise, 2020 was a super busy and successful year for me. After losing my part-time job in April (after having already taken a leave of absence), I bucked down on doing what I love — creating content and recipes. I shared some of my favorite dairy-free recipes and shared shopping tips to help save money.

In February, I got involved with the On Our Sleeves campaign. Partnering with Nationwide Children’s Hospital, I travelled to Columbus with other bloggers. The experience was life-changing. I met so many other influencers who value the importance of mental health. And it also happened to be the last time I travelled, as the pandemic struck the US shortly thereafter.

My goal is to continue building a community. I want to offer resources for parenting, money challenges, recipes, and also mental health.

But there’s another part of my ‘career’ that really blossomed this past year. I took on a very unexpected role in public service. And I am seeking reelection for the first time later this year.

My wish for health

At the beginning of 2020, I was on a path to better health. I had been practicing intermittent fasting and I was getting healthier. But I was also still teaching cycling and was super active with my kids at the YMCA. The pandemic didn’t immediately side-track my health, but by the Summer it had. I had grown tired of the same old routine at home. We were eating a lot more takeout. And my workouts were minimal.

Knowing what we know now, and about how this is going to be a long road back to ‘normal,’ I’m taking a different look at health. I’m truly focusing on whole mind-body health. In October of last year I bought a Peloton. My work schedule was so busy in October and November, that I really didn’t get ‘into’ riding until December. But upon finishing cycling workouts I’m reminded of just how good exercise is for my mental health.

While my kids have remained super active throughout the last year, I’m trying to get them to be more intentional with moving their bodies. They’ve started doing kids yoga on YouTube and talking more openly about their mental health.

Cheers to 2021

I surely hope that you and yours remain healthy throughout this year. What big or small goal do you have for this year?

Why I’m Intermittent Fasting

January 30, 2020 by Rachel 36 Comments

PIN ME - Why I Chose Intermittent Fasting

I recently shared a quick Instagram Story about how I’d begun Intermittent Fasting and it spurred a lot of questions, so I wanted to elaborate on why I decided to start intermittent fasting.

Intermittent Fasting, or as it’s commonly referred to, IF, is cycling between periods of eating and fasting (restricting food). I’ll further detail the form of IF I’m doing and why below.

What brought me to Intermittent Fasting

I wish this was an easy answer, but it isn’t. After years of near-abuse to my body by restricting calories and over-exercising, I got pregnant with my oldest child. When I returned to work full-time, I was able to semi-maintain some balance with food and exercise without going overboard. But I never got back to my pre-baby weight or jeans size.

Fast-forward to one job-loss and two additional babies later, and I have basically spent the last 4.5 years as some sort of baby incubator or feeding-machine. It took a toll on my body, physically and mentally. I tried Weight Watchers, with some success, but I was still tired of limited results and calorie-restricting.

During my time breastfeeding babies over the last few years, my husband would mention intermittent fasting. He had success doing an 16:8 fast (fasting for 16 hours and having an 8-hour eating window). I couldn’t participate because I knew that doing this was not conducive to my milk supply.

Well I am happy to say that I am completely finished breastfeeding and will not ever again be pregnant. Hooray! This whole ‘finished nursing’ thing is relatively new and came as quite a shock to me. But when I sat down and thought about it I realized that it meant I could finally get back to feeling like ME (physically, emotionally, and mentally).

Seeing results in-real-life

About a year ago my mom started her Intermittent Fasting journey. I’ll admit, I was an almost immediate naysayer. I told her she was starving herself and that this practice of over 18+ hours of fasting was detrimental to her health.

But I watched her flourish. She never had much (if any) weight to lose, but she did tone and seem much more full of energy than before. I watched her break her fasts and her diet (meaning food, not the typical term “diet”) seemed completely unrestricted. She navigated the holidays with ease and zero stress.

So I asked her for more information. And she invited me to join this Facebook group she belonged to. Then I was hooked.

Delay, Don’t Deny

The Facebook group “Delay, Don’t Deny: Intermittent Fasting Support,” is based on the book of the same name, by Gin Stephens. Upon approval into the group, I tried to absorb as much knowledge from the participants as possible. After a few days of reading testimonials and questions from other members, I decided to listen to the audiobook Delay, Don’t Deny. It answered every question I had about the process.

Note: Gin Stephens, whilst having her doctorate, is not a physician, nor is she a nutritionist. But she backs up her book with data from scientists and nutritionists and puts it into laymen’s terms for the rest of us. I would like to also note that I am not a physician nor a nutritionist. For questions regarding your health journey, please consult your physician.

The entire premise of the book is as follows: Calories in/calories out is not a successful way to maintain weight loss. Science shows that prolonged fasting will train the body to enter ketosis. Ketosis, or the metabolic process in which the body burns fat instead of glucose for energy, happens naturally and gives our bodies the training they need to develop sustainable eating habits.

This blew my mind. The science backs it up and I immediately felt free from all of the years I obsessed over calories-in, calories-out. Additionally, the idea of working out to ‘burn calories/earn food’ is basically discredited. Working out to be healthy, build muscle, or simply, for fun, is really the idea she explains in her book.

Clean Fasting

The idea is to do a Clean Fast, meaning that during the time you are fasting you are only consuming unflavored water or black coffee. No food or sugar-free drinks are ‘allowed’ during the fast because it will trigger your glucose and prevent your body from entering ketosis.

Breaking The Fast

Breaking your fast, or what Gin refers to as “opening your eating window,” happens at a time you deem right. During your ‘open window’ you shouldn’t deny yourself certain foods. Naturally, during appetite correction, your body will crave foods that are good for you. But if you want wine and french fries? Have wine and french fries! Diets don’t work because they require restricting ‘bad foods’ for long amounts of time.

This is a lifestyle change, not a diet

Another quick note regarding diets — If someone recommends a program you have to pay for (Keto Coffee, Faster Way To Fat Loss, Beachbody Shakes, or Herbalife Shakes), it is a gimmick. You don’t need any paid program to take control of your health and your eating.

After reading Gin’s book and fasting for two weeks now, I can say I’m committed to this lifestyle change. I haven’t had to give up the foods I love and I’m still getting almost immediate results. The scale is slowly moving in the direction I want it to, but I’m also experiencing increased mental clarity, clearer skin, and more restful sleep!

I know you may be saying “but it’s only been two weeks,” and you’re right. But for the first time in my adult life, I feel FREE. Free from diet culture, free from restrictive eating, and free from anxiety regarding health and weight loss. Everyday I witness the transformations of people in this Facebook group and it encourages me that I am on the right path.

I realize that this can seem completely foreign for many people. Heck, it was to me for a very long time! But I am so excited to continue this lifestyle. I promise to keep you updated!

Do you have any questions for me?! Want to know what my typical fast looks like?!

PIN ME: Delay Don't Deny: Intermittent Fasting for the busy mom

One Year Out // My Third Postpartum Journey

June 18, 2019 by Rachel 3 Comments

It’s hard to believe that one year ago today I was… anxious. Anxious and excited. I was beyond ready to meet our final and missing piece. It would still be two more days of waiting before Miss Mila Rose made her way into the world. And I spent these days doing a lot of walking and a lot of impatiently awaiting the start of labor.

But let’s back up — because if you had asked me if I wanted to have any more children after Remy was born 3.5 years ago, I would have emphatically said “Hell to the no.” And I’m not certain what changed. But at some point, I realized that our family needed a little bit more craziness. Enter our 3rd (and final) pregnancy.

Looking back on those last moments as a family of 4, I realize that, although I was anxious, I was also calm. I was ready — perhaps more ready than I’d ever been to tackle labor. I knew my body was capable of handling a rough 24-hours or so, all to help this beautiful new creature enter the world.

But what I didn’t realize at the time is that my postpartum experience would be drastically different this third time around. I was heavily prepared to be on the struggle bus shortly after delivery.

When I was okay, I decided not to hold my breath. I was just waiting for the other shoe to drop. But it didn’t. At least, not really. Or not in the same way as before.

And as I round out these last couple of days with my final baby, I’m celebrating the fact that we did it — we made it through our last postpartum period. Hoorayyyy!! Now let me snuggle my last ever newborn for just a teeeeeensy bit longer! Thursday will be here before I know it. ♥ ♥

Taking A Moment To Find Myself // My 3rd Postpartum Journey

May 13, 2019 by Rachel 13 Comments

I needed this Mother’s Day in ways that I cannot even convey to you. Just Saturday, I was a broken down mother — exhausted from the grind, full of self-doubt and self-pity. But late Saturday evening, I purchased a pass to Balance + Brews at Royal Docks in Canton.

Balance + Brews is a group of local yoga teachers that do pop up classes in craft breweries throughout Northeast Ohio. I’ve been meaning to show up for a class for years, but there was always a reason I couldn’t make it. In fact, this time I almost self-sabotaged — I almost decided not to go because I was afraid of going alone. But I bought the ticket anyway. I committed.

And as I was driving down the highway completely alone, blasting music from my college days, I realized… I needed this. I honestly cannot tell you the last time I went further than Target (which is about a half mile) in the car without a child.

And then to have a meal completely alone? It just sealed the deal for me.

Don’t get me wrong, I love my children. But the weight of always being “on” has really taken a toll lately. It took me until Sunday to realize just how much I missed being with my most authentic self. And in those moments of ~~screaming~~ singing Thursday songs at the top of my lungs, I made a vow to make myself a priority. Starting now.

So to all of the mama’s out there who are struggling to find their new identity, I see you. If you can, go ahead and take a drive, blast that music, and remember who you are.

And Happy (Belated) Mother’s Day.