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Mental Health Awareness Month

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It’s May! And that means that it’s Mental Health Awareness Month! For those of my audience who have been around for a few years, you’ll remember that I’ve been on my own mental health journey for the last 10-ish years. It all seemed to really come to a head when I had my first child. There was no longer a way to pretend that my anxiety and depression didn’t exist. Not when another life depended on me being present in every moment. But also, in that moment, I began my advocacy journey towards spreading mental health awareness.

Mental Health Awareness Month

My mental health journey

While my advocacy journey started 10 years ago, my mental health journey started long before that. Prior to having my son 10 years ago, I had gone almost my entire life with undiagnosed depression and anxiety. My family suffered the traumatic loss of my grandfather when I was young. And, due to the circumstances surrounding his death, it sent me into a bit of a spiral. I have vivid memories as a child of not understanding how so many kids were happy when there were bad things happening in the world every day. If that doesn’t scream depression, I’m not sure what does.

My depression and anxiety manifested itself in many ways over my adolescence, but it ultimately became unmanageable when I became a mother. I remember going to both my OBGYN as well as my primary doctor, in tears, telling them both that I just couldn’t go on any further. I’m lucky to have had physicians who listened rather than write it off as ‘baby blues.’

My postpartum depression and anxiety worsened the second time around. There was a point, at my lowest, where I considered taking myself to the hospital and checking myself in. I tell this story regularly, because it was a pivotal moment in my mental health journey. At the time, I said this out loud to a friend. And she responded with the following: “Just know – that if you do that, they WILL admit you.” In that moment, I realized I was cognizant enough to understand that as much as I thought I wanted that; I realized that, deep down, I wanted to be present for my new baby.

But I also understood that there may be a time where I could have responded with “I know and I’m ready for that.” This realization came with a lot of shame. But it shouldn’t. And the only way we’re going to move past the stigma of mental illness and mental health is by talking about it, openly, with others. One in 7 women will develop postpartum depression after giving birth. It’s well past time that we start talking about it. The lives of mothers depend on it.

Why speaking about mental health is important

The way we ultimately lose people to mental illness is by refusing to talk about it. The stigma surrounding those of us with mental illness is astounding. We talk about mental health not being a “casserole illness”. Meaning, it’s not a broken leg, or a heart attack — which you can visibly see someone struggling from. No one thinks of bringing the person going through a severe depressive episode a meal.

But we should. And the only way we are going to get to where both types of ailments are on the same page is to talk about them the same way. Truly!

Our children aren’t immune

You would think that as an adult who suffered as a kid, I would understand exactly what it’s like to mother a child with mental illness. But I don’t. In fact, even as a mother, I’m not clinically trained to deal with children’s mental health issues.

Mental Health Awareness Month

Childhood is tough. And perhaps the saying ‘children are resilient’ should be retired. Because, are they really? Or does our ‘resiliency’ as children later manifest itself as unhealed trauma?

Mental Illness Risk Factors

Like most diseases, mental illness can be hereditary. In fact, nearly 1 in 4 Ohioans struggling with mental illness. My dads side of the family has a history of mental illness, and now it’s a risk I’m passing on to my own children. But it doesn’t have to be something that is hidden. It’s important that we discuss family history of mental illness in the same ways we discuss family history of heart disease or diabetes. If you’re looking for more information on risk factors to mental illness, check out BeatTheStigma.org.

Mental Health Awareness Month

Resources You Need to Know

No one should have to go through mental illness alone. And, luckily, no one has to! You can visit FindTreatment.org for treatment options. You can also call the Ohio CareLine at 800-720-9616. If you’re in immediate danger and need a text resource, please text the mental health crisis line at 741741. Trained mental health professionals are standing by, day or night.

If you’re interested in taking a mental health screening, head here. You can find additional resources for children at OnOurSleeves.org.

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A Busy Moms Guide to handling Depression

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Dealing with mental illness can be daunting, to say the least. When I first accepted that I suffered from depression, I was in the thick of it. Sure, I had depressive episodes before (usually when a life-altering event happened), but it wasn’t until I was tasked with taking care of someone other than myself that I began to really come to terms with my own mental health struggles. In a way, having children saved my life. But having children also adds a whole other level of stress to my mental health struggles. Finding time, as a mom, to handle my ongoing depression became a real struggle. So,I’m sharing my busy moms guide to handling depression in hopes that it will help others get a grip on their mental health, like I have.

A Busy Moms Guide to handling Depression

Use deprexis® on your time

Using artificial intelligence, deprexis® is a web-based program used to help manage depression. It uses proven techniques to provide counseling without having to deal with a live person every time. Basically, analyzing your personal input and responses to develop an approach to help you with your depression. The best part? It’s available 24/7. No needing to find a sitter, and no struggling to get out of the house to make an appointment.

A Busy Moms Guide to handling Depression

Create positive thought patterns

I’m not a stranger to self-help. In fact, I’ve been actively on medication for depression for several years. I know how much I would benefit from therapy, but it just isn’t in the cards for me at this moment. Clinically tested, deprexis® uses cognitive behavioral therapy-based techniques to identify negative thought patterns and replace with new ways of thinking.

A Busy Moms Guide to handling Depression

This type of therapy is incredibly effective. After being in the deprexis® program for over a month, the suggestions and techniques have helped me tremendously. After taking a series of questions in which you are given a couple of pre-populated answers, a program is put into place.

My program, which is specifically designed for me based on my responses, includes a long list of activities to help boost my mood. Those include some of the following:

  • Fun activities (such as listening to music, taking a hot shower, or playing with my children, just to name a few).
A Busy Moms Guide to handling Depression
  • Competence activities (like preparing a well-cooked meal, going for a long walk, or doing volunteer work).
  • Attachment or bonding activities (such as meeting new people, giving someone a hug, or doing something together with someone).
A Busy Moms Guide to handling Depression
  • Control activities (like saying “no” to something, expressing your opinion, or teaching something to others).
  • Self-esteem activities (such as helping someone in need, making a realistic plan, doing an exercise that makes your body feel strong).

Continue with other treatments

Talk therapy and cognitive behavioral therapy are wonderful options when it comes to treating depression. But they don’t have to be the only options. Using deprexis® along with any standing orders from your physician or a psychiatrist can certainly help treatment.

At the end of the day, treatment for depression will help not only you, but the people in your life. Untreated mental health disorders can manifest in so many ways. Please head to the deprexis® website for more information on how to sign up. You can also try it for 30% off using this promo code: CENTRAL30

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31 Day Self Care Challenge

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The past year has done a number on all of us. I know find myself riding a roller coaster. Some weeks I feel like I have it all under control; other weeks I am struggling in every way possible. Each day of this 31 Day Self Care Challenge I’ll give you a simple actionable task that you can do. Whether it’s starting your morning off on the right foot, or sneaking in a workout for the day, after 31 days you’ll be amazed at the difference in your mood.

31 Day Self Care Challenge

Self Care Week ONE

Day 1 

Wake up 30 minutes early and sit in silence or with your favorite podcast.

Day 2 

Make a list of at least 5 things you’re grateful for.

Day 3 

Do a brain dump on a pad of paper, a notepad in your phone, or even in a Google doc. 

Day 4 

Make your favorite recipe (or your favorite meal from a takeout restaurant!).

Day 5 

Rewatch your favorite movie.

Day 6 

Spend 15 minutes organizing any space in your home (I recommend going through the junk drawer!).

Day 7 

Aim to drink at least 64 ounces of water today.

Self Care Week 2

Day 8

Unplug from social media for one full day.

Day 9 

Learn a new skill.

Day 10 

Create a vision board.

Day 11 

Go through old photos.

Day 12

Pick up that book you’ve been meaning to read and get started.

Day 13 

Try your hand at a new recipe.

Day 14 

Write down a list of personal long-term goals.

31 Day Self Care Challenge

Self Care WEEk 3

Day 15 

Catch up with a friend or family member by phone.

Day 16 

Learn a new skill.

Day 17 

Bake your favorite dessert.

Day 18 

Take a long, relaxing bath with a bath bomb.

Day 19 

Move your body with a NEW workout!

Day 20 

Binge watch your favorite (or new) TV show.

31 Day Self Care Challenge

Self Care Week 4

Day 21 

Treat yourself to ice cream.

Day 22 

Take yourself out on a solo date.

Day 23 

Break out the coloring books and take some time relaxing with some crayons (or colored pencils)!

Day 24

Take a nap — you deserve it!

Day 25 

Go for a 20-minute walk by yourself today.

Day 26 

Write a friend a letter and send it (yes — snail mail!).

Day 27 

Dress up and take some selfies (even if you have nowhere to go!).

Day 28 

Plan your dream vacation (even if it’s just a dream).

31 Day Self Care Challenge

Self Care Final days

Day 29 

Plan a night in for yourself.

Day 30 

Make a new playlist.

Day 31 

Do a digital cleanse by clearing out old files, upload photos to the cloud, and clear out your phone and laptop.

Self-care doesn’t always come easy for busy moms, but this challenge will allow you to find those pockets in your day to sneak in some time for yourself.

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Maternal Mental Health Matters: Quit telling moms they’re overreacting

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I first became a mom 8 years ago. Before I became a mom, I had the perfect vision of what type of mom I would be. You know, the kind of mom that doesn’t yell, only serves their kids organic foods, and has zero temper. Well we all have plans on the type of parent we are going to be before we have kids. But kids have a way of humbling us. And as a ‘seasoned’ mom of three kids, I have advice for all of the advice-givers: quit telling moms they’re overreacting.

Maternal Mental Health is fragile

Did you know that one in 8 women experience postpartum depression? I did. Because I became one of those statistics. And it hurt me to my core to come to grips with this fact. I knew I was supposed to feel a tremendous amount of joy after the birth of my first child; but, instead, I felt an unimaginable anxiety and disappointment. And, while this might not be the case for every mom, we are doing all moms a disservice by pretending that any one stage in a child’s life is “easy”. Every single stage in a child’s life comes with its own set of difficulties and setbacks.

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But, perhaps, a mom has a very bad infant stage or toddler stage. In those fragile moments, a mother may be at her breaking point. I myself have been there. She may be questioning if she can do this at all. Why perpetuate the myth that others are doing it (or handling it) better than us?

“You’ll miss this someday”

I cannot tell you how many times I was told this. By the grace of God I decided to have a second baby. Our first was so colicky and my postpartum anxiety was out of control; but we still decided on a second baby. My luck? Our second infant was worse than our first. Unbeknownst to us, she had been dealing with chronic UTIs from about 6 weeks to 9 months. She would scream (and, I kid you not) for 22-23 hours a day. That left approximately 1-2 hours of (broken) sleep in a 24-hour period. How does a newborn even survive on that? No idea.

Quit telling moms they're overreacting

But I will tell you what, I almost did not survive that.

In fact, I can vividly remember three times that I almost self-admitted to the hospital because of psychological issues. And, I don’t take that lightly. I was at least cognitive enough to realize, in that moment, that if I checked myself into the hospital, it would be a disservice to my child physically (she wouldn’t take a bottle).

But the suicidal ideation remained. Even through my existing anxiety and depression medication, motherhood had taken its toll. And I cannot tell you how many times I heard “someday you’ll miss this,” and thought about how I must be a failure — because I could not imagine missing this moment.

Whether its infancy or toddlerhood or adolescence, it’s all difficult

I recently engaged in a Facebook conversation on a mommy page (I know — that in itself is the problem). The original poster had created a poll — which is more difficult? The infant stage or the toddler stage. My initial gut-reaction was to answer the poll. Duh, infancy. And then I pulled back. I read the article in question. And, as I deemed this group an engaging and progressive group of moms, I decided to point out the obvious (to me) — this article is hella problematic.

First, it is entirely dismissive. I realize this was a tounge-and-cheek type of article. But, to quote the author , she slept — “Nevertheless, I felt clear-headed and was able to get good chunks of sleep both at night and during the day.” And a clear head is basically the key to keeping one’s sanity.

But one in 8 women don’t feel that way.

If you tell one of those women struggling to get up and take care of her baby that “she will miss this one day,” it may be the thing that pushes her to a breaking point. Suicide is one of the leading causes of death in new mothers.

And articles such as stated above — as well as the dismissiveness of others — can certainly compound on that feeling of hopelessness.

Please stop telling moms they’re overreacting

Here’s a thought — don’t tell anyone — not moms, not dads, not the lady at the grocery store — that they are overreacting. Let us all recognize that we are living a very narrow margin of the full spectrum of possibilities. If you wouldn’t tell someone with a physical ailment that they are overreacting, don’t say it to someone who is (potentially) suffering from a mental ailment. Period.

My Wish For the New Year

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Twenty-twenty was anything but awesome for many people. I, myself, didn’t have too terrible of a year. Thankfully, the health of my family remained in tact. And I was able to stay at home and care for my young family. I realize that this is not a position that everyone was in. But I found myself pleasantly surprised by the turn of events that landed me in a new role serving as a public official. That stands as only the beginning of my wish for the New Year.

My Wish For the New Year

My wish for my personal life

Twenty-twenty consisted of some major changes in my personal life. I said goodbye to people who had come into my life at various points over the last few years. In many ways, I saw this coming. I knew that 2020 would be a game-changer when it came to politics. I knew that my personal politics, which I stand firmly grounded in, would be pushed up against those with severely differing opinions. And, in many ways, I was prepared for that to happen. But that doesn’t mean it didn’t suck to lose people.

Moving into this new year, I hope that my new and strengthened relationships from 2020 continue to grow. Even if that means I’ve curated a very close group of like-minded friends and acquaintances. I will nurture those relationships and hold them close. It’s the only way to remain close to people throughout a pandemic.

My wish for my career

To my surprise, 2020 was a super busy and successful year for me. After losing my part-time job in April (after having already taken a leave of absence), I bucked down on doing what I love — creating content and recipes. I shared some of my favorite dairy-free recipes and shared shopping tips to help save money.

In February, I got involved with the On Our Sleeves campaign. Partnering with Nationwide Children’s Hospital, I travelled to Columbus with other bloggers. The experience was life-changing. I met so many other influencers who value the importance of mental health. And it also happened to be the last time I travelled, as the pandemic struck the US shortly thereafter.

My goal is to continue building a community. I want to offer resources for parenting, money challenges, recipes, and also mental health.

My Wish For the New Year

But there’s another part of my ‘career’ that really blossomed this past year. I took on a very unexpected role in public service. And I am seeking reelection for the first time later this year.

My wish for health

At the beginning of 2020, I was on a path to better health. I had been practicing intermittent fasting and I was getting healthier. But I was also still teaching cycling and was super active with my kids at the YMCA. The pandemic didn’t immediately side-track my health, but by the Summer it had. I had grown tired of the same old routine at home. We were eating a lot more takeout. And my workouts were minimal.

Knowing what we know now, and about how this is going to be a long road back to ‘normal,’ I’m taking a different look at health. I’m truly focusing on whole mind-body health. In October of last year I bought a Peloton. My work schedule was so busy in October and November, that I really didn’t get ‘into’ riding until December. But upon finishing cycling workouts I’m reminded of just how good exercise is for my mental health.

My Wish For the New Year

While my kids have remained super active throughout the last year, I’m trying to get them to be more intentional with moving their bodies. They’ve started doing kids yoga on YouTube and talking more openly about their mental health.

Cheers to 2021

I surely hope that you and yours remain healthy throughout this year. What big or small goal do you have for this year?

How to Host a Social Distancing End of Summer Cookout

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Summer will be over before you know it, and what used to be a fun season of cookouts and fun summer hangouts has turned to waving to your neighbor from across the lawn. If you are looking for a fun way to celebrate the end of summer, you can still have a fun end of summer cookout, safely. Here are some tips to help host a social distancing end of summer cookout.

girl with american flag

Keep things clean and sanitized

If you are going to have a cookout where you will be sharing items and touching surfaces, you want to make sure that you are keeping things clean! The main reason for social distancing is to reduce the number of germs being passed around, so ensure that you are keeping your areas clean and sanitized often. Have sanitizing wipes readily accessible, and don’t forget to wash your hands often.

purple and blue wine

Seat in sections and grab food in rotations

If you are serving food, make sure that you spread out seating and implement food rotation areas. This should help prevent contact between others and still allow you to talk to one another without shouting! Try to avoid sitting too close to each other and take advantage of your full yard or block if you live on a less busy street. It may not be the best option for every situation, but you can still have a decent celebration this way!

man cooking on grill

Bring your own food and supplies

If you want to avoid cross-contamination, bring your own supplies. This includes food, drinks, and whatever else you will need. While it’s not as fun to have everyone bring their own supplies, this can keep people from getting sick from contacting another person’s stuff. Having everyone bring their own things could end up being the best option if you’re feeding a lot of people. Just make sure that you still keep your distance from each other, even if everyone brings their food and supplies.

flowers with pie

Get single-serve materials for serving, drinking, and more!

Single-serve options are not usually an excellent idea for the environment. In this case, they could be lifesaving! Encourage people to use canned sodas instead of a 2 liter and avoid contact hot spots. Encourage the use of disposable products and single-serve items that don’t require you to wash afterward.

Move to the front yard

Normally cookouts take place in the backyard huddled by the grill, but instead, bring your cookout to the front yard! Have all your neighbors sit in their yards and enjoy cookouts together! Each person can make their own dish, and you can still be near each other even if you can’t sit right next to them. You can also play fun games that don’t require you to be near each other or play contact games. 

While nothing can replace the fun of standing next to your neighbors and friends to celebrate the end of summer, hopefully, this will help ease the pain of not being able to hug your loved ones from afar!

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