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See, nothing in particular has been going wrong. In fact, things have been going pretty well. Most days, very well.
Until recently.
Recently I’ve been worried about all of the horrible things that could potentially happen. And that? That is not at all helpful or healthy. Mostly related to the kids, because one of the many things that having children has done to me is to make an already anxious person more anxious — specifically when it comes to their safety.
And the events of yesterday sent me into a bit of a tailspin.
See, I am one of those people that regularly DOES worry about mass-shootings. Every time I enter a building, with or without my kids, I look for the exits. Every time I go to a sporting event, I hold my breath. Every time I sense someone may be following me through a store, I am on high alert.
It’s just ingrained in my DNA. And I don’t know how to change it.
The root of my anxiety stems from an early childhood experience involving the murder of my grandfather. From then on, I was acutely aware of the randomness of violence. Hence, I’m terrified of being anywhere… ever.
And, since yesterday, I can’t help but feel my anxiety bubbling up from the surface even more than before.
I held my babies closer over the last 24 hours. I don’t know how to stop the hate and violence. I don’t know what to do about the state of affairs. I just… I just don’t know what to do on a larger scale.
But here’s what I can do:
- I can teach my children to love everyone, regardless of race, religion, or country of origin.
- I can teach them to have an understanding of all cultures and the importance to never “other” someone.
- I can teach them to live by the Golden Rule. Do good, be good, see good.
- I can show them what empathy looks like. I can show them that you don’t have to know a person to show love.
- I can teach them to always be aware of their surroundings (something that I’m eternally grateful that my parents taught me from a young age).
But we still need to do better. As humans, we need to be better. So I encourage you to please talk to your children about people who are different from them; Teach them that every person and every story is valuable; and talk to them about what to do in an emergency. And always tell your babies how much you love them. Always. ♥ ♥
*Disclaimer: I realize the motives of this terrorist from Las Vegas are not yet known. I do, however, believe that most hate comes from a place of not seeing things from another person’s point of view.
Jenni
This is beautifully said. I also deal with pretty acute anxiety and it’s sometimes helpful to focus on the good things I can do to outweigh my anxiety.
Sharon
Oh man, I could totally see myself acting super anxious when I raising kids, too. I will need to refer back to this post to help calm me down, for sure!
Alyssa
I feel the same way. How do we raise good kids when there is so much bad in the world? It’s terrifying and we need to be strong role models for our kids.
Logan Can
Oh. My. Gosh. I feel like you wrote the words straight out of my mouth. I am also an anxious person who has gotten even worse since having kids. I worry about them drowning at the pool and I have not been to a movie theater since that shooting happened there a couple of years ago. It’s ridiculous. I hope you find something that helps you and calms your anxiety. Take some time for yourself. Praying and going for a walk or taking a long bath helps me.
Ruthie Ridley
I LOVE these:
I can teach them to live by the Golden Rule. Do good, be good, see good.
I can show them what empathy looks like. I can show them that you don’t have to know a person to show love….
I really appreciate informative and insightful posts like these!!
courtney
My heart is so full of emotion for you right now. I am very similar to you in that I struggle with anxiety and I very much struggle with the same awareness of violence and worse case scenarios when I am out of my house. It can be debilitating and I would never want my kids to live like that. Raising them to be kind and to love above all else is so important.