Letting Go Of Mommy Guilt //

March 12, 2017 in #MomLife,busy mom,children,mommyhood,parenthood,postpartum

Do you ever feel so overwhelmed by your to-do list that you decide to take a nap instead? That was pretty much my life last week. I can’t even explain why, because I don’t quite understand it. Things are fine. Heck, things are more than fine.

But, still, I’ve been in a funk. A blog funk. And a whole life funk, if you will.

I just needed to break away from the incessant lists and chores; I needed to flake on my obligations and emails; and I needed to nap — a lot. So I did.

But not without guilt.

And then I started thinking — WHY, when this happens, do I feel guilty??

A break from everything must be what I needed. Right? I mean, without just coming home from work and napping while the kids napped last week, I don’t think I would have been even a semi-pleasant person to be around.

And ya know what? Everyone lived. Everyone lived with dirty dishes and clothes that needed folding; everyone lived with skipping karate and eating rotisserie chicken three times for dinner this week; everyone lived while caving in to toddler-demands of cereal for lunch and iPads before bed We. all. lived.

So I’m letting go of all the guilt. And going forward, I’m giving myself permission. Permission to let go of control; permission to eat takeout; permission to neglect to-do lists; permission to take naps; and, most of all, permission to just live in the moment and raise happy and healthy kiddos.

How do you balance your to-do lists with self-care?? 

{ 47 comments… read them below or add one }

Sarah Clouser March 12, 2017 at 12:43 pm

It is so hard balancing the mom guilt! It is definitely necessary to check out for a bit though! Even if that means just ignoring the mess and ordering takeout for a day!

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Teena March 12, 2017 at 3:54 pm

There is nothing wrong with what you did! I get it and sometimes being a grown up sucks. Sometimes you have to check out and be a couch potatoes and don’t cook dinner or sweep and mop the floor everything will be just fine!!

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Jessica March 12, 2017 at 6:36 pm

Been there done that so much. Sometimes we need to just put ourselves first and not feel guilt about it. But, on the flip side, it’s so funny how my family notices how much I do around here when I don’t do anything.

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Charissa | thenotsobusymom March 12, 2017 at 8:22 pm

We can always consider adding “self care” to the to-do list!!

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Vicki @ Babies to Bookworms March 12, 2017 at 11:20 pm

We are so hard on ourselves as mothers to be perfect all the time and we don’t need to be! Give yourself a break sometimes!

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Lucy March 13, 2017 at 7:21 am

I love it! I refuse to give in to guilt too. It is a wasted emotion. It doesn’t help us!

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Kelly March 13, 2017 at 8:19 am

Oh man, I SO know what you mean. On Saturday I let the dishes pile up until they overflowed the sink… and no one cared. And we were all fine. Sometimes, we just need to take a step back and do absolutely nothing.

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Bobbi March 13, 2017 at 8:33 am

It’s hard…I’m learning to give up control of something’s. At any given moment if someone were to visit my house there will be toys in the floor or a coloring book that someone forgot to put back (the kids are 5 & e) and you know, I’ve learned to stop stressing about it. :). Thanks for sharing your story too❤

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Stephanie Lowry March 13, 2017 at 8:56 am

You go Mama! Sometimes I think mom guilt is the real weight we need to be shedding.

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Beth March 13, 2017 at 9:08 am

Yes, to giving up mom guilt. Guess it keeps us motivated but can also haunt us as well! – I am having it right now as I work for 20 minutes and my kids watch a show. Mom guilt says they should be playing, and my chill out senses are like it’s no big deal.

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Elizabeth Peace March 13, 2017 at 9:55 am

I’m getting better at it, BUT still go through this sometimes, too!

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tineke - workingmommyabroad March 13, 2017 at 11:26 am

Amenn!!! I often struggle with the same thing and when I finally do take a break from everything you realize that the world doesn´t stop turning. Great post mama!

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Kelly March 13, 2017 at 12:55 pm

Such an awesome and important read! We all have a little bit of guilt over sometimes the silliest things! It’s always good to let go!

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Ashley Markwood March 13, 2017 at 1:11 pm

I feel mom guilt ALL the time … and I’m a stay at home momma that sees my daughter 24-7! It’s so hard, even when I take an hour away, I feel like I’m being neglectful! Ugh!

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Sara March 13, 2017 at 1:12 pm

Yes, please let go of the guilt! Guilt steals and lies and belittles.

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Belle March 13, 2017 at 1:29 pm

I feel you! I feel the same way too, all the time! Such a great read!

http://www.simplyevery.com/2017/03/mom-life-mondays-blog-link-27/#comment-3571

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Christine March 13, 2017 at 2:24 pm

I often feel the same way. Timeout is so important for my mental health, and yet for some reason, I always feel like I’m doing something wrong, or that I should just be able to cope. It’s encouraging to hear other mums feeling the same way, as then we know we’re not alone!

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Krysten March 13, 2017 at 2:48 pm

As I type this, I need to take a shower, but I also need to do blog work. So I have no idea how to balance. I try to set times to do everything, hoping that it helps me to start balancing.

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Sumer March 13, 2017 at 3:48 pm

Amen!! I completely agree! I so struggle with this exact same thing. But your explanation of the mom guilt is spot-on. Thank you for the reminder that it’s okay to take a nap every once in awhile and everything will be just fine!

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Dawn P Darnell March 13, 2017 at 4:51 pm

Balancing everything is tough! Hang in there!

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Shahla March 13, 2017 at 4:53 pm

Good for you! Such a great reminder to let go of the guilt. Moms need a break too!

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Jessica March 13, 2017 at 6:01 pm

Mom guilt is real and it is so necessary to let it go!

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Lindsay March 13, 2017 at 7:00 pm

Mom Guilt somehow finds all of us, but I so wish we could all just recognize it for the cheap lie that it is. You take your breaks, Mama, and we’ll join you in solidarity!

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Danielle March 13, 2017 at 8:53 pm

Love this! I hate how much I let mommy guilt get to me. But you are right, its ok to take a break. Thank you. 🙂

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Emily March 13, 2017 at 9:00 pm

This happens to me, too! I was laying in bed with the stomach flu yesterday, and started feeling guilty for not working on my laptop. But you’re right, sometimes a break is just what we need. Great post!

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Patrice March 13, 2017 at 9:41 pm

Mom guilt is so real, and I’ve never been the type of person to get down on myself. I’ve always been a “do your best, learn from mistakes, do better the next time” sort of person, but with momming, I make one simple flub on the day and my whole disposition may change! This may be in part to the pregnancy hormones, but I tell all my mommy friends, and mommies to be that it’s important to love yourself and give yourself credit for doing your best in that day! Love your post!

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Arushi March 13, 2017 at 10:45 pm

Yes I hear you mama, recently I was out of town for work for 6 days and I was so guilty. I kept looking at my phone and seeing all day what my 9 month old did. It made me feel bad . But my husband told me the same thing. We survived, he ate , he slept, so dont think too much and take this as a much deserved break .

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Christelle March 14, 2017 at 1:20 am

I can relate! We must let it go 🙂 Thanks for the reminder that we are all in it together 🙂

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Rochelle March 14, 2017 at 9:18 am

I’m getting better at it, but still have my moments. We are all just doing the best we can.

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Bethany March 14, 2017 at 9:27 am

Prioritizing self care is so important to me! It helps me tremendously.

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Katrina @ Every Super Woman March 14, 2017 at 11:34 am

Mom guilt is definitely something I battle with every day. Working on letting go some of the things…

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Alexie March 14, 2017 at 12:18 pm

SO MUCH YES! Seriously I can’t even tell you how much yes there is. Im so happy i found this today!

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brittany March 14, 2017 at 2:02 pm

The mom guilt is strong over here! I feel guilty as i type this and my daughter is napping on me!

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Stefanie March 14, 2017 at 2:07 pm

Oh, I’ve been there many times! It’s hard to put yourself first, but sometimes you just have to before you snap!

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Whitney March 14, 2017 at 3:33 pm

Mom guilt is all to real. Give yourself some grace.

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Lauren March 14, 2017 at 4:37 pm

Yes! We all need a “minute” sometimes, we are only human! Good for you for taking some self-care time for yourself.

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Meg March 14, 2017 at 5:33 pm

Oh, mommy guilt. How well I know it. It’s funny how sometimes those funks just come, and I’ve realized that it’s a sign I usually have been neglecting some of the important things in life and getting too caught up in the day to day mundane chores and such. Another big thing for me was getting rid of the word “should” in my vocabulary. Thinking I “should” do something just reminded me that I didn’t want to and made me feel guilty. Now, I think about whether it will make me and my family happier if I do something, and I act accordingly.

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Angela Kim March 14, 2017 at 9:26 pm

yes we all live and why do we suffer from guilt so much? Kudos to you mama, you deserve to nap a lot when you’re tired.

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Gloryanna March 14, 2017 at 9:34 pm

Such a good reminder and one us moms need ALL THE TIME!

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val March 14, 2017 at 10:09 pm

Needed to read this today! We’re definitely the hardest on ourselves

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Allison March 14, 2017 at 11:40 pm

It can be so hard but totally necessary to let go of it!

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Lisa March 15, 2017 at 12:44 pm

“Everyone lived” <– YES!!! I love that! I completely agree with letting go of the mom guilt! We deserve it AND it makes us better mamas 😉

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Hanna Smith March 15, 2017 at 1:38 pm

I too have been in a major funk! But I recently did a huge purge on my house and got rid of of lot of unneeded things and helped.

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Anna nuttall March 15, 2017 at 1:59 pm

Every mum feel the guilt. My advice – don’t feel guilty. Ever. You are human and you still control your life. Go out and enjoy yourself, there nothing wrong with it .xx

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Justine March 15, 2017 at 2:37 pm

YES! Def. needed this today. The dishes will still be there, “everyone lived” there’s so much pressure to do everything and to be everywhere! It’s cool that we’re not, and that’s okay! ❤

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Patricia March 16, 2017 at 6:11 am

I can totally relate to this!! “Everybody lived” is exactly what I need to tell myself!!!

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brittany March 17, 2017 at 8:21 am

love this! mom guilt is the biggest stealer of our joy

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