But I’d be lying if I didn’t credit my good friend Lexapro*. See, I accidentally went off of her when Remy was having all of her UTI issues. And I really put off getting in to see my doctor for a refill. It wasn’t because I thought I could live without it; it was simply that I was so tired of dragging two children between doctors and specialists. I was just plain exhausted.
When I finally saw my doctor I slowly began taking my prescription again. After a month or two, I felt a teeny bit better. It didn’t 100% ‘cure’ me, but it certainly helped level me out a little bit. And for those who may be skeptical, I should explain that I was honestly in a very, very, ugly place. To put it one way, I didn’t want to harm myself; but I also couldn’t imagine making it through another hour, day, or week. I’m not be dramatic. I truly couldn’t see past the fog.
Between the Lexapro and a baby that finally began to smile, laugh, and sleep (a little bit), the fog began to lift.
One of the hardest parts of PPD and anxiety is being able to get out of the circular thoughts. It just snowballs and snowballs and down the depressing rabbit hole you go! But with this glorious combination of events, I could finally break myself out of this line of thinking.
Sure, it still hits me. I still have moments where I’m paralyzed by my anxiety and anxious thoughts. But I’m also confident that I can think my way out of it; that I can see my way through it.
And that’s why I’m continuing to talk about it. Because maybe one of you — or maybe someone you know — needs to hear this; to know that they aren’t alone. And there’s just something about knowing you’re not alone in PPD-Anxiety that helps you through the fog.
Have you ever dealt with PPD/Anxiety? What helped you?
*I am not a physician. I am not advocating for medication, but, simply stating that it is part of my journey. Please consult your physician for help with depression and anxiety of any sort.