My Postpartum Depression Story // An Update

November 18, 2016 in children,health,life,mommyhood,parenthood,postpartum,reality,wellness

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Hi friends. I realize it’s been some time since I spoke about my Postpartum Depression and Anxiety. I (finally) got to a place where I needed to step away from my thoughts and obsession (thanks, anxiety) with my sadness to really deal with it. Don’t get me wrong — the talking (and writing) about it certainly helped — a lot!

But I’d be lying if I didn’t credit my good friend Lexapro*. See, I accidentally went off of her when Remy was having all of her UTI issues. And I really put off getting in to see my doctor for a refill. It wasn’t because I thought I could live without it; it was simply that I was so tired of dragging two children between doctors and specialists. I was just plain exhausted.

When I finally saw my doctor I slowly began taking my prescription again. After a month or two, I felt a teeny bit better. It didn’t 100% ‘cure’ me, but it certainly helped level me out a little bit. And for those who may be skeptical, I should explain that I was honestly in a very, very, ugly place. To put it one way, I didn’t want to harm myself; but I also couldn’t imagine making it through another hour, day, or week. I’m not be dramatic. I truly couldn’t see past the fog.

Between the Lexapro and a baby that finally began to smile, laugh, and sleep (a little bit), the fog began to lift.

One of the hardest parts of PPD and anxiety is being able to get out of the circular thoughts. It just snowballs and snowballs and down the depressing rabbit hole you go! But with this glorious combination of events, I could finally break myself out of this line of thinking.

Sure, it still hits me. I still have moments where I’m paralyzed by my anxiety and anxious thoughts. But I’m also confident that I can think my way out of it; that I can see my way through it.

And that’s why I’m continuing to talk about it. Because maybe one of you — or maybe someone you know — needs to hear this; to know that they aren’t alone. And there’s just something about knowing you’re not alone in PPD-Anxiety that helps you through the fog.

Have you ever dealt with PPD/Anxiety? What helped you?

*I am not a physician. I am not advocating for medication, but, simply stating that it is part of my journey. Please consult your physician for help with depression and anxiety of any sort.

{ 14 comments… read them below or add one }

Amanda P. November 18, 2016 at 9:01 am

I’ve struggled with PPD and Anxiety since Matthew was born in May. I had a touch of it with Jeanette but it was far worse when I was pregnant. With Matthew I wasn’t sleeping, I never wanted to leave the house, cried day and night and had thoughts of either running away or self harm that were pretty scary. I too couldn’t see past the fog. I went in to see my midwife and she changed my prescription from Lexapro to Effexor and I finally started to feel better. Once Matthew wasn’t nursing every two hours I finally saw the light at the end of the tunnel in a way. My husband has been a big help as well as having my sister-in-law care for our children (less stress on me and the kids are with family). Some days are better than others but I feel like I’m slowly getting better. I’m reaching out to friends more and spending time with my family.

I hope that you are starting to see the light as well and that your little family keeps you going each day. Hang in there momma, it takes a village 🙂

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Coppelia November 18, 2016 at 5:53 pm

I’m so thankful that you’re feeling better and that you’re sharing your story! I remember telling people that I just was not myself post-partum, but everybody just said what’s wrong with you, just snap out of it. I think the more we talk about our struggles and what helped us, the better we’ll be & the more help moms will hopefully receive. For me, the key was a c-section support group. I had no idea other women feel the same. The meetings and friendships were so healing. I thank God that he put them in my life. I had no idea other women feel the same.

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Maggie November 20, 2016 at 3:12 am

I am so thankful for you sharing your story! After I had my second daughter all of the sudden anxiety hit and PPD had never even crossed my mind. But I literally could not get myself out of the house if my husband wasn’t home. I was scared of everything it seemed like. After reading blogs such as yours I realized what I might be facing and I was able to talk to a counselor that has helped me out a lot. So thank you 🙂

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Samantha Kuzyk November 20, 2016 at 5:07 pm

I’m so glad that you’re starting to feel better! I can’t even imagine how hard it must be to have ppd, you are so brave to share your story!

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Brittany Ashmore November 20, 2016 at 10:28 pm

I so appreciate your honesty! I haven’t been through this personally but I know a tons of moms have and what a light you are to share this!

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Kristeena November 21, 2016 at 3:06 pm

Thank you for being so open and sharing. I haven’t been through this, but I know many moms that have. Sharing your story truly helps others and I thank you for doing that!

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Chanel November 21, 2016 at 7:03 pm

I am so glad you spoke up about this! You have no idea how many women you are helping!

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Beth Newcomb November 21, 2016 at 7:29 pm

I’m glad that you’re feeling better! And that you found something that works for you! ❤

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Patricia November 21, 2016 at 7:39 pm

So glad you have found what works for you. Your journey is your own, but I know that by sharing you have helped so many other women in a similar place.

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Rocy November 21, 2016 at 8:31 pm

So glad to hear you are doing better. I can’t imagine how hard it must be. You are so brave for sharing your story. Many blessings ❤️

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Maggie November 21, 2016 at 9:15 pm

Thank you for sharing your experience, I know it will help many women to know they are not alone.

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Lindsay November 22, 2016 at 12:59 am

Thank you for sharing this! Although I personally have not yet struggled with PPD or anxiety, I know many mamas who have and it is so difficult!

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ashley November 22, 2016 at 1:06 pm

Thank you for sharing your story. I have not struggled with PPD but I do struggle with anxiety and it completely takes over.

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Emily November 25, 2016 at 1:21 pm

Thanks for sharing!! I haven’t personally been through this, but I know a few who have and talking about it and being open about it has helped them so much. Everyone needs to know that they aren’t alone. xx

Emily Lindsey | happilylindsey.com

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